Things A Son Should Know Before He Turns 18 and Leaves Your Side

Family and friends know how much I love making lists. From list of things to do to list of things to live by and lists of what to buy today or in the near future. I write articles with all kinds of lists that have included the list of the most beautiful liberal art colleges to smart and beautiful politicians and even the most worthy WAGS. So when I read an article with a list of what one mom believed she must give/teach her son, I loved it. Though I do not remember if it was a blog post or an article but it certainly stayed in my mind and I vowed that one day I would make one for my son.

As my son grows older there is a certain satisfaction in me because we have come this far but there is also a degree of fear that my kind of rearing may have done a damage or two. Looking at my son and how he interacts with society, I think I can give myself a pat because he turned out right.

Still, I can’t help but worry that in the future he might make a mistake. Am not saying he is not entitled to make mistakes, it is a fact of life that we often make mistakes and we must learn from it. There are mistakes though that should not be made if only we have ingrained these facts for them.

Here is a list of must-not and must-do’s that I thought any son should know before he turns 18 and leaves the home.

  1. The world does not revolve around you. You are just a speck in the microcosm, so don’t expect people to do things for you. You have to work hard to reach your goal; nobody is going to hand it to you. Be aware of what is going around you.
  2. The old lady next to you is someone else’s mom. Open the door or carry her bag and remember that someone else may be doing it for your mom, right this very moment.
  3. Real men wear aprons. The stove, oven, dishwasher, washing machine, iron, the brooms and mop, do not recognize the hands that use them. Learn how to use all these appliances. It may save you from hunger and dirty clothes one of these days.
  4. You do not have a maid; learn to pick up your dirty clothes. And let me say again, that goes the same way for the things that comes out of your mouth.
  5. When you make a promise, keep it. Your word of honor is something to be proud of.
  6. Keep yourself clean, shower daily, trim your nails, and use your deodorant. Do not wear anything from the dirty laundry basket.
  7. It’s alright to get mad but it is not right to use your fists to settle disagreements. Then, read #8.
  8. It is okay to make a stand especially on issues that matter even when everyone else is silent. Know what these are. And know when it's time for drastic measures.
  9. Treat girls as they are meant to treated; they have brains as well as personality, not just bodies.
  10. There has never ever been a good reason enough for you to break up with a girl over the phone. Have the decency, and guts, to talk with her personally.
  11. Break up first before you get into another relationship. Remember you have cousins and you would not want any boy to treat them that way, too. Karma is a bitch.
  12. Real women do not look like Victoria Secret angels. Just take a look at your mom.
  13. Always keep a condom in your wallet; it can save your life.
  14. Don’t drink and drive. If you are drunk, never get behind the wheel.
  15. You are never too old to use the good manners you learned when you were young.
  16. You were taught table manners, too. Use them.
  17. Peer pressure is something all of us have experienced. You will, too. Resisting the pressure and dare to be “man enough” to participate in something wrong will be difficult. The pull to be one with them is a temptation that will be hard to resist. Resisting though will make a man out of you and surrendering to such a “dare” is cowardice. Read #8.
  18. Texting while driving is a big no-no. SEXTING is a bigger offense.
  19. NEVER use the words gay and black in a derogatory manner. Respect people no matter what race, faith or preference, they are people just like you. Treat them as you want other people to treat you.
  20. Admitting your fault or mistake does not make you less of a man. So does showing your feelings or crying.
  21. It would be so beautiful if you can and will always win but this is reality, learn to accept losing with grace and dignity. And never, ever cheat just so you could win.
  22. Enjoy life, in fact, live life to the fullest. Be happy and know that I am always here for you.
  23. And lastly, be the man that I believe you are. Be true to yourself and stay true to who you are. 
  24. Always remember, I love you. 
  25. But, that does not mean you no longer have to call me up every now and then. Like I have always said, moms worry.

Note that this is not in order of importance because I feel that these are all important for my son to know. I know that I have always tried to listen to my son because I know that they also want us to know something and Have written about it in my post all children want their parents to know. Sometimes because we are older and because we are their parents we tend to become dogmatic about what we want and expect them to simply follow. I was a daughter once and know that I did not listen to everything they told me, but I did listen to the most important lessons, and pray that my son does, too.

While looking for a photo to include in this blog post, I saw this beautiful and inspiring blog update 25 Rules for Mothers of Sons and I knew I just had to comment and include this in my post, especially for new mothers, though anyone can actually adapt this list, whether she has a son or daughter.

via Motherhood.Ultimate.Career. on Pinterest.

For those with their own list, do share it with me and all the other readers. 

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